Buggy

The other day my sister-in-law, Becky, told us of her life-long fascination with bugs. Her stories were very nice. Her timing is funny though, because for a couple days now I have been thinking of telling you about my own fascination with bugs. She and I couldn't think more differently on the subject. I will admit that bugs in their natural habitats are kind of interesting--as long as they stay at least two feet away from me. They must never touch me; and if only the bugs could understand, I'd like to make it very plain to them that I DO NOT LIKE THEM IN THE HOUSE! Not in my house, or in anyone else's house. I don't like the way they sneak up and catch you unawares, and scare the pants off you. I don't like the way the little ants clean up my kitchen floor (you'd think I'd appreciate that, but I don't). I look upon bugs with a disgust that amounts to absolute detestation!

Just for the record, I am quite sane.

Well, anyway, let me tell you about me and the water-bugs in Tennessee--the most bug-ridden state in the land of the free. Bruce and I and our little family lived in Tennessee for three-and-a-half years while Bruce went to school (a story for another time). And it was there that I was introduced to bugs I'd never imagined; the worst one to come into my personal space being the water-bug. (And let me tell you now, for the record, that people can give them cute names like "water-bug" but they are really just giant, ugly, disgusting cockroaches!)

Night of the Waterbug

The first time I ever saw a water-bug was on a dark and stormy night. Well, maybe it wasn't stormy. I'd just put the kids to bed and Bruce was out working, so I was alone in my kitchen, writing a letter home. Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I see this GIANT black thing creeping across my kitchen floor. It was the biggest roach I'd ever seen and it was heading toward me! (OK, up to that point it was the only live roach I'd ever seen--but it was in my house!) After squealing and jumping up onto the kitchen chair I realized that I had to do something or I'd be trapped, sitting on my table all night. So, gathering all my courage, I leaped past the monster into the laundry room where we kept the bug-spray on a shelf. I leaped past it again (so I'd have more space to make my getaway, if necessary), took aim and started spraying it. Well, all that did was make it mad. It ran toward me; I backed off, still spraying. I don't think I let go of the trigger for a good minute or two; there were clouds of bug spray in my kitchen and I could tell it would be me or the bug. Fortunately for me, the bug started getting a little confused. I was able to leap past it again and get a canning jar to clap over it. Unfortunately, to capture it I would have to get close enough to put the jar down over it. I summoned up all my courage and, standing as far away as possible, trapped my adversary in a glass prison. I left it there for Bruce to dispose of when he got home--no way was I going to get any closer to it than I already had!

After my horrid battle I had to open the kitchen windows. Then, to calm my nerves, I had to call all my relatives in Utah and tell them of my terrifying experience. I think they thought I was loony, and possibly over-reacting. I can tell you, that is simply because they've never come into close contact with a cockroach that is three to four inches long!

By the way, Bruce did not dispose of my foe. He saved it to show Michael (then about six years old). Michael named it "uglybug" (how appropriate). That bug lived in a jar in my home for another two days before they finally put it outside. I don't know why they didn't just flush it down the toilet!

That was water-bug story number one. Here's the second:

Attack of the Waterbug

One evening after a nice shower I was lying on my bed, bare-naked, air-drying and chatting with Bruce. (A side-note: it's nearly impossible for anything to really air-dry in Tennessee.) As we were talking my eye was drawn to the little breeze-way above our bathroom door. There was a water-bug up there and I could tell it was watching me. Bruce noticed the color leaving my face and followed my horrified gaze upward. Trying to soothe me, he said, "It's OK, it's clear up there." Ha! I could see that bug checking me out. I swear, it's little head was moving back and forth, looking me over and I knew it was going to fly down and land right in the middle of my back. Bruce said, "They don't fly." Ha!! Almost as soon as he said it the beastly thing took flight, aiming for the small of my back. Bruce, my hero, swung his arm like a baseball bat and hit it with his bare hand as I scrambled to make an escape. THOCK! It hit the wall. Did that kill it? I don't know, but we didn't see it again. It was a close call, but I survived it. I also made Bruce wash his hands.

Last story for the night; it was another lonely evening and I was sitting quietly in my kitchen, writing a letter to my family. (Have you noticed that these evil bugs wait until I am most vulnerable before they attack?) I will quote directly from the letter I wrote when it occurred:

Revenge of the Waterbug

"I just had near heart-failure a little while ago . . . I sat down at the kitchen table to work on some things. I sat here, very involved in what I was doing. and from the corner of my eye I see some movement. So I glance over and a giant roach (yeah, yeah--they call them water-bugs) is creeping out from under the table. It must have gone right by my bare toes! (At least it didnt go over my toes. After all, a roach is a roach. And this is a BIG one!) It got over toward the cabinets. Here's the layout: So I jump away and I'm trying to decide whether to trap it under a jar--which would be really scary--or spray it, which would be really gross (stinky). But I would have to go past it to get a jar, and it was moving pretty fast. So I sprayed it. Then it took off along the edge of the cabinet (away from me, thank goodness!) and disappeared into a little crack between the wall and the cabinet front--which put it right in my cabinets where I keep all my canned goods. And I'm thinking, "Bruce had better find that bug and kill it, or I'm never cooking for him again!" But at least I can rest easy and go back to work at the table (with my feet up), right? Ha! Just as I settle down, I hear this, 'click, click, click' of its feet in my cupboards. Then I hear it 'ping!' on the top of a can. 'Click,click, ping! click, ping! ping! click,click.' I shudder with each sound; violent shudders--the sound is coming toward me!" [I can't concentrate on my work. I cringe in terror, my eyes wide and my heart pounding. I am obsessed by the evil I hear coming closer and closer toward me.] "Finally it gets to my end of the cabinet. 'Scuffle, scuffle, click, ping! Scrape, scuffle, ping!' But at least it's trapped in the cabinet, right? Ha!! (Did I ever tell you this house is poorly built?) After a second, I hear a 'Thunk!' and there it is, about three feet from where this terror all started. Well, it is obviously not in as good health, so [I gathered my nerve and] I trapped it under a jar, where it is still giving me the shudders. (But it's Bruce's job to dispose of big, ugly bugs.) Then I went and looked under my countertop, and there's a big hole in the side of my cabinet where Beelzebub obviously reappeared from. This is why I will not live in Tennessee any longer than I have to."

Well, OK. Just one more story. As I was writing this, it occurred to me that I ought to include a picture of a water-bug. So I did a Google search. But when the screen full of bugs popped up I jumped away from the computer about three feet, shuddered, caught my breath . . . Yes, that's me. I had to reach my arm's length to click the mouse and get away from that screen. Find your own water-bug pictures!

Family Campout

WARNING! Be prepared for lots of pictures!
A couple of weeks ago, breaking a long-established rule, Bruce and I told our kids that we would be going on our ward camping trip. What rule did we break? Never tell the kids we are going to do something cool until we are just minutes away from actually doing it. Because then if for any reason we can't do it, they won't think we are cruel, lying tyrants and, in their frustration, make our lives miserable.

As the day of the campout approached (last Friday) we realized that, for various reasons, we wouldn't be able to go. Uh-oh! Well since we really are not cruel, lying tyrants, we tried to think of other things that would be fun to do with the family. Melanie helped out a lot. First of all, she called me last Thursday to ask if she and I could take our kids to Liberty Park. That sounded perfect! So on Friday morning we packed up the kids, packed up some lunch, and headed for the park. We stayed for about four or five hours while the kids played in the water.

Rachel and Kaylie climbing in the "canyons" (after I took a bunch of pictures I saw signs that said "Please do not climb on rocks". Oops!)

Lindsey and Emalee at Liberty Park's "Canyonlands"

Jessica, in the "Jordan River" (Canyonlands, Liberty Park)

Shannon and Ryan at Liberty Park

Kaylie, the supermodel

Some friends in the ward let us borrow their fire-pit so we could toast marshmallows in the backyard Friday night. When I told Melanie about that plan she said we could borrow her tent, too, and set it up in the backyard. So we had the perfect campout: We had a barbecue dinner, ate toasted marshmallows and s'mores around the campfire, and then we told stories and put the kids to bed in the tent. And, best of all, Bruce and I got to "camp" in the comfort of our own bed!

Setting up the tent--without any instructions! Can they build it?

Yes, they can!!

Lindsey does her fire dance.

Fire is serious business!

Around the campfire.

Mmmm! Tasty, toasty marshmallows!

The next day . . .

On Saturday morning we had a pancake breakfast before we broke camp. That afternoon we had a picnic in Big Cottonwood Canyon and then hiked up to Donut Falls. Some of the younger kids were really freaked-out about climbing up to the waterfall. But, cruel, tyrannical parents that we are, we made them do it anyway. The big people (Bruce & Michael, Jason, Lindsey and I) helped them go up, and once we were at the top they were pretty happy about it. We let each child pick up a "courage rock" to take home with them before we climbed back down. When we were home again everyone showered, had dinner and watched a movie before we went to bed.

Hiking up

We salute you!

You put your left foot in . . .

Happiness abounds in front of Donut Falls

We couldn't resist taking this picture: When we got back down to the van we looked up and saw that, on this tree we were parked next to, someone had carved "Brandon + Lindsey" . What have my kids been up to?

Sunday morning Bruce went to Las Vegas on his business trip. The kids and I went to church, and that evening I took them up to Temple Square for a concert and to tour the Conference Center. It was an action-packed weekend! A little tiring, but it was fun.

Dirty, but happy, little hands and faces

I like my family!!

Creeping . . .

Down .8 this week. Now I'm going to stop goofing off and get to work. Really!

Sleepless . . .

Today I've been missing my friend and sweetheart. Bruce has been gone on a business trip. He left for Las Vegas at 3:00 this morning; I heard his alarm go off and woke up enough to say goodbye. And then I tossed and turned, half awake and half asleep until about 7 a.m. By 8:00 I gave up and just read a book for a while. There's only been about ten times that I haven't slept with Bruce since we were married; eight of those times were when I was in the hospital with a new baby. I did OK at the hospital, doped up on pain killers. But I don't have pain killers to knock me out at home and I'm aware that he's gone even when I sleep.

The kids and I had a pretty good day today. In some ways Sundays are better when I'm on my own. When he is here, I expect Bruce to help with the getting ready for church, so I don't work as hard myself. Today we got to church on time, got home in decent time, had a nice dinner and then went to Temple Square. I can be more on the kids' level when Bruce isn't with us—at least for a little while. They got kind of wild when we toured the Conference Center. I was definitely Mom then: "Stay with the group. Stay with the group. Stop that! Stay with the group!" Still, we did have a pretty nice evening, although I really wanted Bruce by the time we were done.

I was kind of hoping he'd be home by now; the meeting was supposed to end around 3:00 or 4:00, and then there's the six-hour drive. But he called just a little while ago and said he will get home some time between midnight and 1:00. I'm really tired; I expect that tonight exhaustion will win out and I'll get some sleep. I imagine Bruce is pretty wiped out too. Well, if I don't fall right asleep, I at least know I will get to sleep after a nice snuggle around 1:00 a.m. I'll be very happy when he's back!

Lindsey

Today, in my blog land, it is Lindsey Day. I've been thinking it would be nice to say something about each of my kids—just their personalities and what is so cool about each of them. I am starting with Lindsey because she is often the first to volunteer when I say I need help with something in the house, and she is usually the one who sticks it out the longest (the housework). Just last night, while the kids were watching a movie, I said to them, "I need someone to come clear the table." and Lindsey came right upstairs and started working on it. I really appreciate that!

Lindsey was an extremely happy baby. The first time we took her to get her picture taken, in her blessing dress, the photographer warned us not to expect any smiling pictures; the baby was too young to smile, but she (the photographer) would get some nice pictures for us. Boy was that photographer wrong! (This baby picture was taken three days before we did the professional pics.)

Lindsey is a very loving girl. She has to share a room with three sisters, the oldest one being six years younger than she is; but she is usually very kind to them and often reads to them and plays games with them. She really enjoys spending time with family and friends. Lindsey loves her family, animals, new clothes and pretty things (girl); her favorite color is white.

Lindsey is always excited to do and try new things—especially with the proper motivation. As soon as Jason learned to ride a bike (at about age 6) we took him to buy a new bike helmet. Lindsey really wanted a helmet too, so I told her I'd get her one as soon as she learned how to ride a bike. She (at age 4 1/2) was riding all over the place the very next day! She shows that same attitude for everything she wants to do, from baking cookies to reading, to learning a new song. She wants to do things quickly—as I often say, "at the speed of light." Right now is not soon enough for Lindsey. When she learns to control that impatience, her enthusiasm for a project or a new idea will get her far.

If I had to choose one word to describe Lindsey, it would be exuberant!

Funny Girl

Lindsey snuggles Jessica on the beach to keep her warm.