Sad

It has been a month, to the day, since I last posted anything on my blog. Maybe because my life has become a bore.  It's not that I'm not doing things, or not busy. Actually I've been very busy. Over the last month I have patterned and made an entire wedding dress (photos later, when I get them), and I altered another wedding dress (hemmed it and replaced the bodice––and I'm waiting for pics of that one too). Now I'm working on Santa's coat, and then more sewing for Santa (to help out his elves––Christmas is coming fast!).  On top of that, I'm still trying to run my house––at least enough to keep us all alive.

But I'm running the house without my second half. Bruce has been teaching school in Vernal, 176 miles away, since August 11. You might wonder why he took a teaching job in Vernal instead of Salt Lake. Good question.  Bruce doesn't have a full teaching license, but because he does have a bachelor's degree he qualified for Utah state's Alternate Route to Licensure (ARL) program. This gives him a temporary teaching license so he can have a full-time teaching job while he goes to school to take the extra classes he needs to get the full certificate. He has two years (from the time he got the teaching job) to finish his license.  But the school districts here in the Salt Lake Valley absolutely will not hire an ARL teacher. So he applied in other districts in the state, and Uintah School District (Vernal) snatched him up. (He got a glowing recommendation from one of the principals he subbed for last year––because he is an awesome teacher!)

This is Mr. North's school picture for Maeser Elementary School. He is teaching 5th grade, and is a very popular teacher. :-)

At first we thought he'd find us a place to live out there and we'd all move. Instead he found that a one-bedroom apartment costs almost the same as our current house payment. (Fortunately Bruce found a very kind family who have taken him in as part of their family––rent free. He's become very good friends with them.) See, the oil fields in Vernal are booming right now and even an entry-level truck driver makes 1 1/2 times what a school teacher does. So housing prices have shot up (almost double what they are in Salt Lake, and triple what we still owe on our house), and the demand is high. In short, we can't compete.

I had considered this possibility when Bruce drove away that first day in August. I thought that he might have to finish his teaching certificate in Vernal while we lived here without him for two years, seeing him only on the weekends. And I knew it would be hard, but I believed that it would get easier as time went by; never fun, by any means, but more bearable with time.In fact, what has actually happened is that it gets harder and harder for me to send him away each week. During the weeks I have to take care of things like kidney stones, oral surgery, installing a dishwasher, the van completely breaking down (completely––not worth paying for more repairs), kids running six different directions, and managing the house all by myself. On the weekends I only see Bruce for 14 to 20 hours (waking hours); it's not enough. It's not enough time for him to do the things that I can't do myself, and spend time with the kids, and not nearly enough time for me. I am lonely.

And, consequently, I can't think of anything interesting to write about. Aaawwww! Pretty sad, huh? It makes me feel babyish just to write this. Especially when I have so many things to be grateful for—like Bruce's job, and his dad helping me out so much while Bruce is gone, and my really nice kids.
But I miss my husband desperately.